Wednesday, April 22, 2009

On to DE, or not?.

So we did the donor egg program consult. I filled out the charts of what I wanted in a donor. I like charts. I put our criteria in order, and agonized how to prioritize it. We spent hours at the clinic meeting with the doctor, the program coordinator, our nurse coordinator (ooo - we'd have a nurse I could specifically call with questions??? i liked this!! No more feeling lost in the system with no one specific to call), and of course, the financial coordinator.

I wasn't feeling great about everything. On the one hand, I wanted to achieve my goal of having a baby, but on the other hand, I was giving something up that was pretty substantial. And had I really tried everything I could to use my eggs? As the weeks past after our heartbreak, I felt much stronger emotionally, and was willing to put my emotions at risk again. Was it worth the money? What if I tried IVF again and failed, and was at this same spot a month later, but $14k poorer.

A lot was going through my head so I decided to get a second opinion. Heck, I shop around for everything I buy... why shouldn't I do the same here?

So we had a consult at another local clinic where others I know have had success with. The doc there said he thought I was crazy to go to donor eggs. He felt strongly that I was reacting well enough to the drugs to give me a good chance with my eggs. He had cases where there was only one embryo, where none grew enough to be retrieved - I was nowhere near the worse end of the scale. And this clinic offered an assigned nurse coordinator, the ability to communicate via email (how incredibly convenient for me!), and the satellite office for monitoring was right across the street from my office (to be fair, the other clinic was only 10 minutes away, but still).

We went home to talk about it and both decided we wanted to go for it!!! We realized that we hadn't given up our dream of a baby that was genetically both of ours. And this just felt right.

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