Wednesday, April 29, 2009

The DH (and pre-ultrasound jitters)

I haven't written much about my DH on this blog yet, so let me tell you a little about him...

He's the calm one in our relationship. I'll ramble on a mile a minute, get myself worked up about things, and he keeps me grounded. He's the one who fixes and makes things. He's got a garage full of tools and has made so many improvements to the house we bought just last year. Me, I like to buy things online. I have the book smarts, he's got the mechanical smarts. He can do electrical, plumbing, carpentry, and all that handyman stuff, while I make sure we both max out our 401(k)'s and pay our bills - through Quicken, of course (although, oddly, it's me who always hooks up all the home theater and computer equipment - I love doing that. Strange). He works in a family business during the day, and is a personal trainer who travels to his clients' homes in the mornings and evenings. And I've done several marathons and love to run, so we've helped each other improve our workouts.

We compliment each other well. He jokes that we have a role reversal - I bring in the big bucks, manage our finances, and am obsessed with electronic gadgets; and he contributes to our family in other ways closer to home. The last time we had dinner with another couple, me and the husband were going on and on about DVRs, FIOS, wireless routers and IR repeaters. DH and the wife looked at us like we were nuts and called us geeks all night!

So many of the blogs I've read (and people I know personally) talk about husbands who are not supportive during the infertility process. Maybe they don't want to have babies using a petri dish, or are opposed to egg donor, or won't consider adoption, or put their foot down financially. I am so lucky to have a husband who is supportive of whatever I want to do. He tells me that he completely recognizes that it's me doing 90% of everything - going to the docs, getting injections, having my body go through changes, scheduling conflicts with work, dealing with the financial aspect - and he has told me so many times how much he appreciates and loves me for it. He is willing to do whatever I am comfortable with, however many times I want to do it (or not do it), he just wants to have a child with me in whatever form that takes (natural, IVF, DE, adoption).

I'm very lucky to have his unconditional support - it's one less thing to stress me out in the very stressful journey.

PS: I woke up this morning feeling scared about the u/s tomorrow. All of a sudden, I'm terrified they will find it's not viable. It will all be a cruel joke and I'll be right back where I started, feeling foolish I ever thought this would really work for us. I don't have any real strong signs of pregnancy yet - breasts are a little sore (not much), and I have to pee a lot, but that's normal (I drink a ton of water). That's about it. I know it's still very early - about 5 weeks - but I would like to feel something more. I'm trying to think good thoughts and stay positive, but I'm definitely apprehensive.

1 comment:

  1. I wish you lived close to me...I'd hire your dh to come over here and build/fix things at our house! My husband is Soooooooo NOT handy! And he hates to even try. He is, however, very supportive about the whole IF thing, like your dh.

    Try not to dwell on tomorrow's U/S. I know it's hard not to. Just try to enjoy today and not over-analyze it.

    Hoping and praying for the best.