Out of control!

OK, I am officially out of control!!

I had my first maternity shopping excursion this weekend with my pg friend, and I'm a little embarrassed to say that in a few hours, I racked up about $600 in clothes from Pea in the Pod, Motherhood, Gap, and a designer consignment shop. But that's not all.... I've also ordered at least another $400+ online from Old Navy, JC Penny and Pea in the Pod (again). I was hoping to keep my maternity clothing purchases under $1000 for the entire pregnancy, but clearly that won't happen!!

Now, to be fair, there were some things that were unavoidable and shouldn't "count". I needed new bras and panties - I bought them on sale and there's nothing fancy about them, so I don't really count that. I needed the "mama spanx" shorts to wear under dresses and skirts because my thighs now rub together. Lovely. That definitely doesn't count. And I also bought a body pillow to help me lie on my side all night. That's not even clothing. So maybe I'm about $100 less when I take out the things that "don't count".

But still, I spent a lot. Now, I'm a very good bargain shopper, so I think I made some great purchases for the money I spent. And I think the real problem is - I not only need casual clothes, but I also need "business casual" and "business formal". So I need many different wardrobes. Perhaps $1000 was never a realistic goal?

Now, the sales ladies said that the clothes are designed these days to last the whole pregnancy. I'm not sure I see how that can be! Yeah, they have stretch, but I don't want to look like a sausage at the end!! We'll just have to see how this progresses. If all the weight goes to my tummy, I might be OK, but if my butt and thighs start seeing some action, all bets are off!

Luckily, with my bday coming up, my mom wants to take me into NYC next month to buy one or two really nice work outfits. That will be a big help (and a lot of fun, too!). I think, for moms, maternity clothes shopping is a little like shopping with your daughter for her wedding dress. And since I eloped in Hawaii, and bought my dress myself, I kind of stole that one from her... I'll let her make it up with maternity clothes!

Right now, I'm still fitting into a lot of my normal clothes, which is good because I haven't told people at work yet. I spent over 6 hours this weekend going through my closet. I came up with about 10 big garbage bags of clothes for Good Will and about 4 garment racks of clothes that don't fit me now (the size 4's, 6's and even some slim-cut 8's of my pre-IVF days) that I will store in the basement. So everything in my closet now fits me, looks good, and is organized. That makes me feel so happy! And after I lose the baby fat, I can go "shopping" in my basement for clothes that begin to fit me again.

I will say - I do like the maternity clothing look. I must be a freak, but I think it's adorable! I can't wait to have more of a bump! Right now, I could look pregnant or fat - it could go either way. The scale hasn't changed at all, but my body is definitely changing.


OK.... so how convincing does all of that sound? All of that happy pregnancy giddiness? I'm trying to feel like that, I really am, but here it is, a week since my last appointment, and I'm starting to freak. I don't see the doc for 3 more weeks, and it feels like forever. I don't understand how I'm just supposed to assume everything's OK???

And just when I think I'm over the first trimester uncertainty, and into the "safe" second trimester, two things happen:

1) DH and I were at the car dealership on Friday. The lease was up on his fun, sporty, yellow Xterra, so we traded it in for a more family-friendly Pathfinder (and I guess we'll need to do the same for my convertible, soon!!). We've worked with the sales guy before (nice guy, believe it or not), and he mentions his wife is pregnant. Turns out, she's 2 weeks behind me. We get to talking about difficulties getting pregnant, turns out she's had 3 miscarriages. Two were before 8 weeks, but one of them was at 17-18 weeks!!! No warning, no bleeding, just... no more heartbeat. Just what I need to hear.

2) I realize that I've been feeling this strange sensation... When I've been sitting for a while (at work, watching TV, whatever), and then I get up, I feel a heavy pressure by my pubic bone. Doesn't really "hurt" but very uncomfortable. Goes away after about 5 minutes of walking and standing. I emailed the nurse, she said it's normal, just the muscles readjusting, but Mr. Google says it could be a sign of incompetent cervix. The exact thing I'm now afraid of.

Ugghhh!